‘THE ANGEL IN disguise at your table may ineptly face-paint your wee ones, whose tears will mend holes in hand-me-downs.’ When the pharaoh in a jealous rage launched his genocide, the angel who descended from Adam and from heaven led an army against him, streaming like light from the sun in splendour. Though he’d dreamed […]

‘THERE ARE TWO extremes: the fresh print and the fossilised print; detection and preservation. Most of us escape both.’ Students stand in flour and then step aside onto paper. Meanwhile, the lecturer expounds one of the niceties of sleuthing: the marks of other non-living items (not just shoes). ‘Think of bicycle tracks, or even a […]

‘IF THE TROPHY hunter fails to close with an animal that satisfies his strict criteria, he may never fire a shot all season, except, in the final weeks, for meat.’ The raffle prize? The chance to name and shoot a lion. He’s licensed to take three and ship their heads back home. An English-speaking bearer […]

‘THE KENDAI IS a fake bluefin, a hatchery bum, with no more understanding of the sea than a concubine in the court of Genghis Khan.’ Pilots who ditch their planes and take to a life raft qualify ipso facto for the Goldfish Club. Crossing-the-line humiliation brings protection by order of King Neptune. Copies of certificates, […]

‘THE CALL FROM tree to tree makes total sense of the darkness. The wood just woke me when it drained itself of light – you too!’ They venture from their lairs, a furtive demolition crew. Daylight, not this dark, is the realm of secrets. The woodland floor is teeming – careless around the base of […]

Robert Saxton: ‘You’re still planning your reckless adventure, pondering what you’ll need?
Just take half the clothes and twice the money, and go.’

‘A HIGHLIGHT OF the first International Phonetics Symposium will be a click song in Ndebele – with drum accompaniment (tsk! tsk!).’ Mouth breathing, speaking of the private troubles of the nose, shows symptoms akin to vacancy. Yogis find the practice disgusting. Exhalation through the broad hatch of the mouth reduces back pressure, hastening air escape, […]

‘THOUGH THEIR FAITH requires slenderness, transparency for the landscape, there’s an issue all bridge-makers face: the curse of the signature.’ Stresses hold their balance for the leap from shore to shore. Those who wish to linger often reduce themselves to some special provision, an eddy in the flow. Minutes are precious but an hour feels […]